McCain's Convention Nightmare

Are you ready for some political football? The date? September 1. The place? St. Paul, Minnesota. The teams? John McCain versus everybody else. As The Washington Post reports today, anticipation is running high for the showdown between Republican conservatives and their presumptive party leader. At issue is the G.O.P. platform, which, at present, is a 100-page-long decree that mentions George W. Bush's name at every scintillating, right-wing turn of phrase:

Virtually the entire platform will have to be rewritten to lessen the imprint of the president, who has the highest disapproval rating of any White House occupant since Richard M. Nixon.

And that's what has conservatives itching for a fight. Will the new Republican road-map include such McCain priorities as global warming, stem cell research, immigration reform, and campaign finance restrictions? Just how many planks can you change before you simply admit you've installed a new floor altogether?

Ebell [Myron, of the Competitive Enterprise Institute] said McCain should be careful as he and his allies seek to change the platform to reflect his political sensibilities. "He attracts a lot of votes in the middle--independents and moderates," Ebell said. But, if he pushes on each one of these issues--campaign finance, immigration, or global warming energy issues--he's likely to keep a lot of people at home on Election Day."

Of course, it's a drag going to a party whose host you really don't like. And if you're a purist, like fellow Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul, you say to hell with all that, and schedule your own party.

Just to be sure McCain hears the message of discord loud and clear, Ron Paul (George and Ringo) has booked his own "mini-convention" so as to overlap (like a minor eclipse) over the bigger party down the way:

Maverick GOP presidential candidate Ron Paul has booked an arena in Minneapolis for a "mini-convention" that could steal some of John McCain's thunder just days before he accepts the Republican nomination.

Aside from thunder, it seems Paul has also stolen McCain's former nickname. Never mind. You see, by the time all the Republican squabbling is set to start, Barack Obama will have already given his acceptance spectacle at mile- high stadium to 75,000+ people on the 40th anniversary of Martin Luther King's "I Have a Dream" speech.

Fire up the teleprompter, boys. McCain is coming in for another bumpy landing.