Is Sarah Palin Too Orange For America?

UPDATE: After reading the analysis below, check out our candidate pumpkin carvings by clicking here!

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Last night's Vice Presidential debate was fun. A nice break from the unfolding financial cataclysm that will soon transform us to a Mad Max economy. My big takeaways:

- Joe Biden's teeth are very white. So are Barack Obama's. If they're elected, the White House photographer will have to adjust his/her flash. Otherwise every photo will just be a big blur.

- Sarah Palin has a gorgeous neck. Everyone thinks I'm off on this. But I really do think the contours and swoop of her neck are lovely. And no sagging underneath the chin. Democrats should stop denying this.

- It seemed like Biden was really taken with Palin. No, she hasn't turned out to be the 1930s heroine (Rosalind Russell is His Girl Friday, Katharine Hepburn in Philadelphia Story) that conservatives and pundits of all stripes hoped: the brains-and-beauty double-whammy who knocks heads with, and eventually falls for, her equal. Instead she's turned out to be much more of a 1950s leading lady: think Sandra Dee in Gidget. More plucky than feisty. Or maybe Judy Holliday: a classic idiot savant -- with extra-hidden savvy.

Here's the moment I wanted to see: After one of Palin's irresistably inane moms-and-mavericks monologues sputters to a close, Biden flashes a grin, then walks right up to Palin's podium. The audience holds its breath. A worried Gwen Ifill rises from her chair. A security guard steps in behind Palin. But Palin turns away from the guard and right toward Biden, tossing her hair, one arm on her hip, doing her best to project confidence. But her trembling lips give her away.

Biden: You need to be kissed ... and often ... by someone who knows how!

Biden grabs Palin and the two engulf each other in a kiss. Palin is ravished, unraveled by Biden, lifted off the ground. Is the room spinning? The audience cheers. Ifill shakes her head and throws up her notes. She knew this would happen, and she's not about to stand in the way of bipartisan romance. Biden sets Palin back down. Palin points at his mouth, then turns to camera.

Palin: What's the difference between any ol' Democrat and Joe Biden?

The audience (in unison): Lipstick!!

- Finally, because race is such a huge part of this campaign, it must be said: Sarah Palin is distinctively -- and increasingly -- orange. I mean, creamsicle-colored. Setting aside the issue of why she's so orange (is this in deference to Halloween? if so, is she too seasonal a candidate?), here is my question: