The Rise and Fall of Joe

News out of Toledo, Ohio via The Hotline's On Call:

He [Joe the Plumber] doesn't have a plumbing license required by the city of Toledo to practice, according to a staffer with the Toledo Division of Building Inspection. Wurzelbacher, who now works for Newell Plumbing & Heating Co., said the owner, Al Newel, has a plumbing license and that "because he works for someone else, he doesn't need a license."

But even that's not true, according to the Toledo Division of Building Inspection. Wurzelbacher can't legally do plumbing work without a license, regardless of his boss's certification.

A staff person with the Toledo Division of Building Inspection told On Call this afternoon that her division will contact Wuzelbacher to notify him that he can't work without a license...

How quickly the media spotlight turns into a giant magnifying glass, harnessing the sun's rays on your flesh as if you were an ant. Also discovered yesterday? Not only is Joe not licensed, there's no record of his completing a required apprenticeship program, and may have to return to job training to satisfy the Ohio State Apprenticeship Council. Right about now, Wurzelbacher must be thinking, somebody wake me from this nightmare.

I feel sorry for Joe. Let's face it, he got in way over his head. He thought he could score some quick points for the guy he'd voted for in the primary by playing the part of the everyman, undecided voter. Just asking a few honest questions. What could be the harm in that? Hey, it's not a crime to pretend you're something you're not, is it? But while he thrilled at the chance to stick it to Barack Obama on the question of taxes during a chance encounter on the streets of Toledo, his elevation in the ranks of McCain's army (which occurred when he was used as a debate prop) brought with it the kind of scrutiny that no ordinary Joe could want.

In an eerie, slow-motion replay of the vetting catastrophe known as Sarah Palin, Joe's truer portrait -- a Social Security-hating, property tax-owing, McCain primary-voting, not even close to business-buying contractor -- started to emerge. The guy who implied that the only thing standing between him and small business ownership was Obama's ruinous tax plan, was, it turns out, not a certified plumber, and would, under Obama's plan, actually see his taxes go down. Again, nobody's perfect. Being disingenuous isn't exactly news, and Joe isn't (yet) running for office. So he equates paying taxes with socialism, so what? It takes all kinds. None of this would really have been but a blip on the national radar had McCain not decided to blow Joe up into symbol.

Well, predictably, like a tree branch through the wood-chipper, Joe has been spit out onto the mulch pile. The problem? McCain wanted him to be made a star, and our media-addicted culture is crazy for stars. Overnight, he became the hottest story in the country. So, the television talking heads started interviewing him. Was he ready for this barrage? Who among us would be? And when the Q and A revealed a mind-set that raised a few eyebrows, the media backlash was on.

Just as with Palin, all that network attention and question-asking, which seemed so fantastic at the outset, was suddenly getting out of hand. And, in the end, his media trial-by-fire was itself all that many on the right needed to declare him a hero (see above photo), call it innocence by association. For these people, the liberal media and their Democrat [sic] overlords are to blame for this high-definition travesty. Never mind that a legion of robots is presently speed-dialing every resident of Wisconsin and Virginia claiming that Obama & Ayers, LLC, is fixing to bomb the country into submission. An everyman plumber has been wronged! Avert your eyes, children, lest you be forced to watch more GOP propaganda be exposed for what it is.

Of course, John McCain bears the primary responsibility for this fiasco. Badly in need of a "game changer," he used Joe as a weapon, re-configuring his stump speech around the working-class hero before the ink had dried on the Faustian contract. Hell, this is going to be good for Joe's plumbing career, McCain supporters agreed. McCain has got that Midas touch, all right.

One thing is certain, Hollywood will pay Joe handsomely. And with that kind of money, he'll be able -- with all sincerity this time -- to complain about his taxes going up.