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Isn't It Great How All Americans Love Obama?
Posted:
11/10/08
Filed Under:Democrats, Barack Obama, Featured Stories, 2008 President, Gay Rights, Ken Layne's Outrage, LOLection
Like everybody in America -- each and every person in America! -- I have been extremely hopeful and ecstatic since my man, Barack Obama, won the presidency.Have you seen all those People and US Weekly magazine covers down at the Circle K? Could it be more clear that all of America voted with total love and confidence for Barack Obama, the best new president of any country in World History? (I am sorry about endorsing John McCain last week. He is a dumb loser and I've always known that, in my heart. Sorry.)
It has been a busy week, what with the birth of my new biracial children, Obama #1 and Obama #2.
PD toolbar!
They aren't really my children, but the gay marriage of my pregnant sister and her pregnant lady friend was suddenly voided by Mormons from Utah who were so concerned about what gay people did in San Francisco that they were compelled to launch this Propositon 8 thing in California ... $70 million in "Yes to 8" teevee commercials later, and suddenly these lesbian babies have no mommies and just one daddy. Me. It is
We are all facing tough times, during this Great Big Depression, and it's pretty clear life will be miserable from now on, at least until Obama takes office in January and begins sending the $10,000 checks to each American household, every month. Did you not know about this?
Obama's new Chief of Staff, Hugo Chavez, faxed the details to all of us Obama supporters this morning. (If you didn't get the fax, well ... let's just say a lot of things aren't really going to "go your way" for the next 12 years.)
Have you ever seen those "IF YOU'RE NOT MAKING $10,000 A MONTH, CALL 555-1212" cheap xeroxed signs pasted up in the poor foreclosed housing tract strip mall death hubs of America? Of course you've seen them! But you never called. Always thought it was a "scam," didn't you?
It wasn't a scam. It was Obama's staffing office in Chicago. I called. And it turns out they've just been writing checks, day and night. That's why I'm not really worried about raising my new children, these bi-racial infants from a lesbian marriage torn apart by religious zealots from two states away. I'm basically rich now.
I have been "hoping" for this kind of "change," and here it is. Truly, it is morning in America.
Ken Layne is the managing editor of Wonkette, but now he's so rich, because of Obama, that he really doesn't have to work ever again.
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Comments (192)
Bruceb
12:00AM Nov 11th 2008
Yeah isn't it just great our new commander in chief won't even salute the flag, or wear a flag pin, or even sing the national anthem because he thinks it a "symbol of oppression" to some people. He said so himself. Who in the hell voted for this communist? NOT ME
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(0) 
Justin
12:03AM Dec 10th 2008
BruceB, it is sad that some people still believe all those lies about our President-elect. Perhaps next election you should consult some non-partisan sources before casting your vote.
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(0) will
12:10AM Nov 11th 2008
This is a pre-conceived plot. McCain deliberately lost this election. Had a republican won, there would be a civil war. I have spoken with many obama operatives who say they wished McCain had been elected in 2000. They were sad to see him lose like this.
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(0) James
12:11AM Nov 11th 2008
Obama is such a dick. He wont wear a flag pin? Seriously? Its just a pin. He could at least give up 1/4" square of his lapel to the greatest mf'n country on the planet. A country so great we elected him, the chosen one. Neo. The Matrix. Woah. Flag pins.
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(0) shelia9901
12:12AM Nov 11th 2008
Saying the pledge of alligence is a symbol of oppression for some. I'm Afreican American, and I totally am opposed to any African American saying it. You and I have lived in two different worlds and the plight in american has been very oppressive for African Americans. Until you walk a mile in my shoes, please don't tell me how I feel.
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(0) James
12:20AM Nov 11th 2008
no one said anything to you.
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(0) E. Messler
12:20AM Nov 11th 2008
The endless series of photos shot up at Obama remind me quite chillingly of another series of photos staring up at a popular and charismatic leader ... Hitler.
Obama's election makes me sick. and I believe with all I have not enjoyed the media's starry-eyed and giddy coverage and am not looking forward to the media's fawning adoration for the next four years. Not at all.
God Bless America.
Obama's election makes me sick. and I believe with all I have not enjoyed the media's starry-eyed and giddy coverage and am not looking forward to the media's fawning adoration for the next four years. Not at all.
God Bless America.
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(0) shelia9901
12:21AM Nov 11th 2008
To James:
I have never worn a flag pin. Have you?
I have never worn a flag pin. Have you?
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(0) James
12:24AM Nov 11th 2008
Obama as Hitler? I thought he was more of a Lenin-esque type of guy. Or Mao. Maybe Obama can end up like that Saparmurat Niyazov of Turkmenistan and build 200 foot tall solid gold statues of himself.
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(0) JVZaccaro
12:24AM Nov 11th 2008
Exodus - Chapter 2, The Preparation
On the first day of Preparation, the Beloved One brought His Counselors back together. He had previously asked them to examine the ten most pressing issues He must address, when authority formally transferred to Him. Each issue was placed in its own, sealed envelope, lettered A thru J. After meeting with George XLIII, the Beloved One began to understand the difficulties facing Him. He decided to solve the eighth problem first, with Preparation “H.” He now understood, many more Scholars would be required to govern. He instructed His Counselors to find other loyal subjects, each with a specific field of knowledge. The Beloved One began to assemble His inner-circle.
Exodus Chapter 2, Verse 1, Lines 1 - 8
On the first day of Preparation, the Beloved One brought His Counselors back together. He had previously asked them to examine the ten most pressing issues He must address, when authority formally transferred to Him. Each issue was placed in its own, sealed envelope, lettered A thru J. After meeting with George XLIII, the Beloved One began to understand the difficulties facing Him. He decided to solve the eighth problem first, with Preparation “H.” He now understood, many more Scholars would be required to govern. He instructed His Counselors to find other loyal subjects, each with a specific field of knowledge. The Beloved One began to assemble His inner-circle.
Exodus Chapter 2, Verse 1, Lines 1 - 8
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(0) Autum
12:39AM Nov 11th 2008
I have shelia.
What oppression are you speaking of?
Were you a slave or was it your ancestors??
What oppression are you speaking of?
Were you a slave or was it your ancestors??
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(0) LM.tex
12:36AM Nov 11th 2008
Obama's election makes me sick. and I believe with all my heart that we are in big trouble I have not enjoyed the media's starry-eyed and giddy coverage and am not looking forward to the media's fawning adoration for the next four years. Not at all.
Apologies, the PC dropped the middle of my sentence.
The Hitleresque coverage is terrifying.
Apologies, the PC dropped the middle of my sentence.
The Hitleresque coverage is terrifying.
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(0) Dave
12:36AM Nov 11th 2008
shelia9901
It has been natures evolution that has been most oppressive for African peoples.
If not for the more evolved White peoples, you and I would not even be in contact with one another right now.
It has been natures evolution that has been most oppressive for African peoples.
If not for the more evolved White peoples, you and I would not even be in contact with one another right now.
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(0) LM.tex
12:27AM Nov 12th 2008
I'm not talking political philosophy here, just the pictures.
Scary.
And whoever put Michelle Obama in that red and black nightmare dress ... oh dear.
Scary.
And whoever put Michelle Obama in that red and black nightmare dress ... oh dear.
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(0) hiyama
12:47AM Nov 11th 2008
shelia990112:12AMNov 11th 2008
Saying the pledge of alligence is a symbol of oppression for some. I'm Afreican American, and I totally am opposed to any African American saying it. You and I have lived in two different worlds and the plight in american has been very oppressive for African Americans. Until you walk a mile in my shoes, please don't tell me how I feel.
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What the hell are you talking about.."For liberty and justice for all" "ONE nation under God" ...you are full of sh*t. Do you even know the whole pledge of allegiance? What is so oppresive? Why even bother calling yourself an African-American? Why not just call yourself an African since you don't feel you owe any loyalty to this country.
Saying the pledge of alligence is a symbol of oppression for some. I'm Afreican American, and I totally am opposed to any African American saying it. You and I have lived in two different worlds and the plight in american has been very oppressive for African Americans. Until you walk a mile in my shoes, please don't tell me how I feel.
----------------
What the hell are you talking about.."For liberty and justice for all" "ONE nation under God" ...you are full of sh*t. Do you even know the whole pledge of allegiance? What is so oppresive? Why even bother calling yourself an African-American? Why not just call yourself an African since you don't feel you owe any loyalty to this country.
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(0) Ted T
12:58AM Nov 11th 2008
Anybody notice how all those big posters and t-shirts with just his face have more than a tinge of post-ironic fascism to them? Just sayin.
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(0) Ted T
1:01AM Nov 11th 2008
And are we all gonna be required to have one of those big wall murals of his in each of our towns staring down at us each day? Creepy.
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(0) Jay
1:09AM Nov 11th 2008
shelia990112:12AMNov 11th 2008
Saying the pledge of alligence is a symbol of oppression for some. I'm Afreican American, and I totally am opposed to any African American saying it. You and I have lived in two different worlds and the plight in american has been very oppressive for African Americans. Until you walk a mile in my shoes, please don't tell me how I feel.
How nice. Where exactly does your allegiance lie, if not the United States of America? Why should you be allowed to vote, or have access to social services, or be afforded any Constitutional privileges if you get to decide what your citizenship does or does not mean, or if you get to decide for your fellow "African Americans" what their citizenship means? If you can't support our country, its founding ideals, and its governing documents, feel free to find a better one. Failing that, why don't you start your own? And failing that (of which I have no doubt), why don't you just go cry in your free-trade soy latte and leave the whining to someone who's better at it? And stop trying to make people wear your shoes. Nobody wants to, and it's gross.
Saying the pledge of alligence is a symbol of oppression for some. I'm Afreican American, and I totally am opposed to any African American saying it. You and I have lived in two different worlds and the plight in american has been very oppressive for African Americans. Until you walk a mile in my shoes, please don't tell me how I feel.
How nice. Where exactly does your allegiance lie, if not the United States of America? Why should you be allowed to vote, or have access to social services, or be afforded any Constitutional privileges if you get to decide what your citizenship does or does not mean, or if you get to decide for your fellow "African Americans" what their citizenship means? If you can't support our country, its founding ideals, and its governing documents, feel free to find a better one. Failing that, why don't you start your own? And failing that (of which I have no doubt), why don't you just go cry in your free-trade soy latte and leave the whining to someone who's better at it? And stop trying to make people wear your shoes. Nobody wants to, and it's gross.
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(0) Linda
1:08AM Nov 11th 2008
It has to be heart-breaking for all of the America-bashers out there that they can no longer wail endlessly about what a horrible and bigoted country they live in. (Please note, the loudest of them could live anywhere they wanted.) So, now that "your boy" is about to be President, whatcha gonna bitch about? It is going to be a bittersweet pleasure to watch that dude fall on his face.
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(0) shelia9901
1:16AM Nov 11th 2008
You don't have to be a slave to have dealt with the racist ideas that the United States was built one. I will never have alligence to a country that has no alligence to me. I will not serve a country that does not serve me. This blog is a perfect example of the racist attitudes in america. You pick your alligences and allow me to pick mine.
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