Making Room For the First Mother

Imagine you're a junior Senator from Illinois, learning the ropes, making new friends, gathering support for the United States-India Agreement for Cooperation on Peaceful Uses of Nuclear Energy. Next thing you know, you're the leader of the free world with your own jumbo jet, a crack security team, a private vacation resort (with a bowling alley!) and of course a sweet downtown mansion with a 24-hour cook. It's got to feel good.

Now, imagine sharing it with your mother-in-law.

According to USA Today, next month when the Obamas move into 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. they'll be bringing along the woman who looked after their two daughters during the presidential campaign. That would be, um, Michelle's mom. Now, whether or not the President-elect has a healthy relationship with his mother-in-law, it's going to be an adjustment sharing the nation's most important residence with her. I can think of no better way to help Mr. Obama than by sharing with him some advice from a helpful Associated Content article called "How to Survive Living With Your Mother in Law"--written exacty one year ago today:

"1. Always try and keep your distance as much as possible to avoid any conflicts between you two." Let her into the Oval Office even once and you're asking for a "what are you hiding out in here again while we're upstairs planning the Christmas party" comment.

"2. You will notice trying to get a shower, go to the bathroom, or brushing your teeth in anyway shape or form will be practically impossible at times." Maybe you should just live in Air Force One.

"3. Expect that you will have several tasks and chores to do around the home." You know, you can always say you're busy mobilizing the Sixth Fleet.

"4. Also expect on Sunday afternoon during your favorite football game, you will be interrupted at least a few times and always during the most crucial part of the game." If you become a Washington Redskins fan, you won't even have to bother watching.

"5. If you are handy in the kitchen, you may think this will be a good way to show your appreciation... but you will find this is not the case. Whatever you make she will say that she can't eat it due to, too much salt, sugar, spices, diabetes, diverticulitis, etc." Solution: Don't cook for her.

B. Brandon Barker can also be found here.