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    It's Jerry Brown vs. Ken Starr for the Fate of Gay Marriage

    Talk about sexual tension! California is witnessing a showdown between Democratic Attorney General Jerry Brown and Republican attorney Ken Starr in the fallout over the marriage-banning Proposition 8.

    On the hard left, Brown, who filed a brief with the state Supreme Court stating "the amendment process cannot be used to extinguish fundamental constitutional rights without compelling justification." Brown wants the marriage-ban repealed.

    On the throbbing right, Starr, who is representing the anti-marriage group Defend Marriage and believes people are better off getting sexual fulfillment from reading special prosecutors' reports. Starr wants to extend the law to nullify marriages that occurred before Prop. 8 passed.
    Sub-plots also abound as Brown is clearly running for governor in 2010 and needs to establish his liberal credentials against San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom and porn star Marey Carey. Starr, meanwhile, has always harbored an obsession with other people's marriages, and the chance to invalidate 18,000 of them in one fell swoop is sure to get him into the history books. (Or at least into a host's chair on Fox News.)

    No word yet on how the California Supreme Court will rule. If, for some reason, they are deadlocked, look for the case to be bounced to another California court with lesser authority but much higher ratings. Hopefully that court's judge will order Brown and Starr to gay marry one another to settle this case once and for all!
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    Dylan and Ethan Ris

    Dylan and Ethan Ris are political humorists and veterans of Capitol Hill dating back to the mid '90s.

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