Franken To Be Declared the Winner in Minnesota

In the least binding pronouncement to come out of Minnesota since Prince claimed he was changing his name to a symbol, Al Franken will be declared the winner this morning in his Senate race against Norm Coleman.

Democrat Al Franken will be declared the winner of the tight U.S. Senate contest in Minnesota, emerging from a ballot recount with a slim margin over Republican Norm Coleman, state officials said on Sunday.

Now for those greenhorns in the audience who are new to American politics... The answer is: No, of course this doesn't end the race! Norm Coleman now gets to challenge the result in court and bide his time until Antonin Scalia can figure out a way to butt in and award the seat to the GOP. (Another possibility involves Coleman renewing his offer to allow Franken to just give him the seat.)

Of course at this point, the voters in Minnesota are so weary of the whole recount that they'll gladly accept whatever winner is announced, so long as it isn't Tavaris Jackson.

And since one man eventually has to lose, may we suggest a certain New York Senate seat as a consolation prize? It hasn't been filled yet, and the fact of the matter is that both candidates are really from NYC anyway.