As you conicisely state in your summary, The Seattle Study begs the question, presuming as proved the very thing they have set out to prove. At the onset of any life-threatening critical illness, during the medical interventions and especially in that twilight zone called after care, participants in this human drama are suffering from trauma and PTSS. Therefore, it's counter productive to assume anything about the status of relationships regardless of gender: there are just too many "ands, ifs and buts." Let's not judge. Let's remain uncritical and attempt to turn this study over to examine the flip side; then all the sides, too, before we arrive at any conclusion. More open discussion and further investigations will be needed to either disprove or prove the results of this "study."

I think men leave - which proves my theory that men just aren't going to wash their own socks! Haven't you ever noticed that if a couple divorces or the wife dies, the man wastes no time in replacing his maid?

I don't buy the notion that men leave because every study ever done shows that married men are, by and large, happier than unmarried ones. There is something purely genetic about it, a predisposition that a man's job is to find a mate, create a family, care for that family, etc etc. Much as the feminists hate to address the reality, men and women really are different and the genders are hard-coded in different ways.

The one commonality is that each gender looks for a suitable mate, albeit in different means. Social science spends so much time poring over the abstract that it misses the concrete parts of human nature, like compassion when your partner is seriously ill regardless of how blissful the marriage may be. No man wants the mother of his children to suffer.

Hennenberger asks "But why are we so quick to buy into the "men are dogs'' stereotype?" Because this stereotype is endlessly echoed in movies, on television, in day to day conversation, often by people like bucsmom on this thread, sometimes by people who refuse to realize that a relationship is a two-way street, that people will seek elsewhere what they do not get at home. And, that goes for both genders. A faithful, happy partner is one who has no reason to seek validation from others because it comes at home.

Thank goodness my wife did not shed me after surviving her breast treatment and mastectomy. It would not have occurred to me to bail out on her. We have had years of adjustment to regain a modest sense of security in life and overcome issues of self-image, but life is once again good, and I count myself very fortunate to have such a partner.

Good article. Yes, plenty of 'junk science' out there. Kind of goes hand-in-hand with anything politically charged like gender studies, sex, etc.

And you mentioned ..."And much as I hate to ask this one, are we so eager to embrace the role of victim?"...

Of course not -- that field is still too fertile to stop plowing....

Sadly, it probably has something to do with a negative impact on the sexual relationship. To read more:

http://www.medpie.com/people/featured-articles/infidelity-boss.html